Four Hygge Practices to Protect Your Mental Well-Being During the Holidays

Combining hygge with cannabis to create a soft, grounded self-care experience through the holiday season.

The holidays are here again. And while a lot of people see this season as joyful and bright, there are many of us who face it with a mix of anxiety, heaviness, and emotional landmines. Christmas used to be my absolute favorite time of year—right next to my birthday. All of that changed in 2014 when my mother passed away unexpectedly in her sleep the Monday of Thanksgiving week.

Since then, the holidays have felt different. They no longer represent shopping, good food, and time with the people I love. Instead, they remind me of a life-altering loss and the absence of the most important person in my world.

And honestly? Sometimes I just don’t feel festive at all.

Over the years, I’ve learned to create gentler traditions that prioritize my mental well-being—practices rooted in hygge that help me feel safe, grounded, and cared for during this difficult season. Here are four of them.

1. Establish New Traditions That Promote Healing and Soft Living

The Thanksgiving my mother died passed in a blur. As an only child, I was suddenly responsible for planning a funeral while the rest of the world prepared to “eat, drink, and be merry.” I was newly married, my daughter was home from college, and I convinced myself that I needed to push through for everyone else’s sake.

I also told myself my mom would’ve wanted us to celebrate as normal. And while she absolutely would have wanted me to enjoy my holiday, she would not have wanted me to carry the weight of her traditions on my back, especially if they were hurting me.

My mom went all out for the holidays—decorations, lights, huge meals, the works. The morning she passed, there was a pot of collards simmering on the stove. Continuing her traditions without her wasn’t comforting; it was overwhelming. Cooking through waves of grief was exhausting. And being watched by people waiting to see if I’d “break down” was even worse.

So I stopped forcing it.

These days, I opt out of big Thanksgiving gatherings. I spend the day quietly at home, sometimes even encouraging my husband to go enjoy time with his family. I cook a small, non-traditional meal or I order out. I bake myself a sweet potato pie, pair it with butter pecan ice cream, and curl up with a Turner Classic Movies marathon (bonus points if Bette Davis appears).

To some, that might sound lonely—but for me, it’s peaceful. It’s restorative. And it honors both my grief and my need for softness.

2. Decorating My Home for Christmas

Christmas was my mother’s season. She had a tree in every room, hung her own lights outside, and decorated like she was running a floral boutique. She was trained in retail floristry, so wreaths, bows, swags—she mastered it all. Walking into our home at Christmas felt like stepping into a department store.

While I didn’t inherit her level of skill, I did inherit her eye. (That's my actual living room in the picture.)

Now, decorating my tree has become one of my favorite hygge rituals. The lights, the candles, the soft glow around the house—it all feels like a warm hug from my mom. Once everything is up and sparkling, I wrap myself in a cozy blanket with a mug of hot chocolate and just sit in the glow.

It’s my little hygge hideout—calm, warm, safe.

3. Cannabis Consumption

Believe it or not, I haven’t always been a weed smoker. I experimented in high school, stopped, then avoided it completely through my military career (obviously). I also carried that old-school belief that people who smoked weed were unmotivated or irresponsible.

That changed after my mother died.

I developed anxiety and was eventually diagnosed with broken heart syndrome. One day, someone passed me a blunt on the way to the state fair, and the euphoria I felt let me enjoy the crowd, the lights, and the noise without panic. It was the first time in a long time my body felt calm.

After cannabis became legal in Virginia, I got my medical card and began using it intentionally. It helps with symptoms of CIDP—pain, inflammation, tremors, spasms—as well as depression and anxiety. I treat my cannabis use the same way I treat my other medications: researched, logged, and guided by my dispensary pharmacists.

I even created a strain journal to track how each one affects me. Being high is just a perk. And honestly… if I’m not old enough to smoke now, then when?

From a hygge perspective, cannabis helps me relax into my space and feel more present, calm, and content—exactly what I need during the holidays.

4. Do Unto Others

Last year, I was still in a wheelchair but able to get in and out of the car. Most of my Christmas shopping was done online, but those curbside pick-ups became my little outings. I’d received so much support from friends and family throughout my health journey that I wanted to give something back.

So, I created self-care boxes—coloring books, markers, fuzzy socks, candles, treats, bonnets. Putting them together brought me so much joy. Watching people open them? Even better.

If money or time is tight, simple acts still count. Slip Christmas cards in your neighbors’ mailboxes with a Starbucks or sweet-shop gift card. One year I gave Krispy Kreme gift cards to the larger families in our neighborhood.

Even small gestures spread warmth—which is the heart of hygge. And giving feels just as good as receiving.

Final Thoughts

If you’re someone who still enjoys the holidays with ease, that’s wonderful—use these ideas to make the season even cozier.

But if you struggle like I do, I hope these practices help you breathe a little easier this year.

Be merry.
Be at peace.
And most of all—be well.

If this season has you craving softness, warmth, and a little peace, I’ve created tools to help you build your own hygge sanctuary.

📝 High Maintenance: A Weed & Mental Health Journal
Perfect for tracking strains, moods, symptoms, and those cozy moments that help you feel grounded.

🛋️ Hygge-Inspired Merch
Wrap yourself in a plush blanket, curl up with a soft pillow, or slip into a warm hoodie designed to help you feel safe, comforted, and held.

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Treat yourself (or someone you love) to comfort, calm, and care this holiday season.
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